As we enter the season of the Jewish High Holidays, we mark one year since 7th October—a day that cast a shadow over a time meant for joy, love, dance, and freedom. Holidays and anniversaries can bring a mix of emotions. Advah’s message is one of transformation—use this time to draw strength, set intentions, and reconnect to stability amidst the chaos.
Recognising and Validating Emotions
Navigating this journey, we carry stories of resilience. It’s okay to celebrate and feel hopeful while also feeling sorrow. Honour your pain and embrace the potential for healing. Like waves, emotions rise and fall, and allowing them to flow is part of healing. Your emotions are a testament to your strength and the shared process of healing we are all undergoing together.
Understanding Trauma and Chaos
Trauma can disrupt the stories we thought we were living, scattering the pieces of our lives. It thrusts us into chaos, our brains flooded with stress hormones, making it difficult to think clearly, find a sense of calm, process what’s happening, or breathe deeply. In these moments, we seek something to hold onto, to ground us in the here and now, and to bring us back to our centre.
The Stabilising Power of Routine
Research shows that establishing a routine can help increase a person’s locus of control. Human beings are creatures of habit, and routines offer predictability amidst uncertainty, helping to regulate our nervous system. Although routines and consistent habits do not take our pain away… it assists us to create space for healing and new opportunities. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) explains how our thoughts, emotions, behaviours, and physical body are interconnected. Routine lightens our cognitive load, providing structure that allows us to process emotions and make sense of chaos creating a safe and predictable environment. The most accessible place to begin rewriting our story is through small intentional action and behaviour change.
Building a Sense of Competence and Stability
In therapy, we use behavioural activation and activity scheduling as a way of gradually integrating structure into daily life. Sticking to routines allows us not only to survive, but to actively rewrite our stories and rebuild a sense of competency—which often takes a hit during times of trauma and helplessness. This sense of competency becomes a vital internal resource, helping us navigate challenges with greater confidence and reducing our reliance on external surroundings, and factors beyond our control, to feel grounded.
Change happens in the discomfort of growth—when we do things anyway—not because our mood dictates but because it’s set in our schedule. When we don’t have to think about “what’s next”, we can focus on healing and growth.
Integrating Wisdom from Chinese Medicine
Emily Rubenstein, a Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) acupuncturist, shares:
“TCM actually developed a Chinese Organ Clock which designates the most optimal time of day to partake in certain activities (eating, waking, exercising, relaxing, etc.). If we give in too much to randomness, our body’s innate energy, known as qi, gets depleted.
This can look like difficulty sleeping, tendency towards getting sick, IBS, anxiety, and more. While it is not realistic in our modern times to follow this clock to a tee, the sentiment of predictability rings true. In peaceful times, and especially in times of chaos, our physical and emotional health relies on a familiar rhythm to achieve balance.”
Setting Intentions
As we enter this new season, consider setting intentions to create a grounding routine:
Consistent Sleep Patterns: Anchor your day with consistent sleep patterns to help regulate your body’s internal clock
Eat Meals at Regular Times: Nourish your body with regular meals to maintain energy levels.
Exercise: Engage in physical activity to release stress and gain mental clarity.
Get Sunlight, Especially in the Early Hours: Exposure to natural light can improve mood and regulate your circadian rhythm.
Train a Creative Muscle: Explore creative activities like paint by number, pottery, or cooking.
Final Thoughts
Hold in mind that seeking stability through routine is about creating anchors in an unpredictable world, not about eliminating chaos. Having anchors assists us to reclaim our stories and provides us with space to heal and thrive. If you need help, please remember that reaching out for support is a sign of strength. We believe that being resourceful and seeking help are powerful tools in order to renew and to rebuild.
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