Supporting People After Loss

It is not easy to say “Chag Sameach and Shana Tova” this year. In general, many find the

time around holidays challenging for various reasons and for those whose loved ones will

not be at the table, the sadness around holidays intensifies. This Rosh Hashana is especially

difficult - it is the first one since the war broke out following the massacre on October 7th.

Every person was affected, whether directly through personal loss or indirectly by collective

loss and sorrow, and the war itself is still not over. As we approach Rosh Hashana, there are

sadly still hostages held in Gaza and our soldiers continue to risk their lives daily to protect

the country.

No doubt, it was a long, tragic, and painful year. Many lives were lost, many were kidnapped

or wounded, and countless people lost their homes, their sense of belonging, and their

communities. Along with the loss of loved ones came a loss of security, hope, and a deep

sense of uncertainty and despair. There is not much good to be said about the past year,

except for the hostages who were rescued and returned and the remarkable spirit of so

many people who found the strength to volunteer and help in any way they could. This was

the light in the darkness.

Rosh Hashana is traditionally a time for reflection, spiritual recentering, and renewal. It is

not only about looking back but also about looking inward and forward. As we reflect, we

must acknowledge the pain and grief and give space to sadness. We need to allow ourselves

to feel, cry, or scream, seek professional support whenever necessary, and look for things

that bring comfort – whether it is exercising, having a coffee with a friend, or taking a walk

on the beach – anything that can help us cope and carry this deep sense of pain, grief, and

loss.

And yes, while we honor the pain we have experienced, we must also nurture the seeds of

hope within us. We must hope not only for a better future but also for the strength within

ourselves to live a good life alongside the losses we have endured. The goal is not to erase

or forget our wounds but to find ways to move forward with them, not despite the pain but

with it. We must remember that even in the worst crises, there is an opportunity for

growth. Just as one may develop PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder), some may

experience PTG (post-traumatic growth). This does not mean that everyone will experience

PTG; it is a deep and meaningful process that takes time. But that is the hope - to learn to

live with all the difficulties and losses we have faced while finding ways to rebuild.

The path ahead will not be easy. We still face immense challenges, both individually and

collectively. The pain of the past year is real, and it will continue to shape us. But so too is

the hope for renewal. As we approach this new year, may we carry both our grief and our

hope with us, and may we do so with compassion and kindness for ourselves and others,

allowing both - grief and hope - to guide us toward individual and collective resilience and

with hope for a future filled with meaning, connection, and peace.

In the hope for a quick recovery of the wounded and the safe return of all the hostages,

Shana Tova.

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